Physical Cues to Sexual Desire: Body -

Sexual desire can increase by becoming aware of our body’s cues. Simply paying attention to our body cues to sexual desire can give us a jump-start in feeling more sexual.

Most of us feel sexual desire through our physical sensations. The body reacts automatically to sexual images or thoughts with increased blood flow to the genitals that result in swelling, lubrication, feeling of heat, etc. These often happen without our conscious awareness.

Becoming aware of the physical sensations offers us the easiest access to sexual cues that we are feeling desire.

How do you begin?

Start out on your own:

Get comfortable wherever you are. Put yourself in an environment that feels good to you, where you will not be interrupted.
Close your eyes (or if you are not in a place you can comfortably close your eyes, turn your focus inward).
Become aware of your breathing. Take a few breaths to notice the rise and fall of your breath.
Turn your focus to your crotch. Become aware of your inner pelvis (and all of the spot around there)
1. What sensations do you notice?
2. Can you feel the throbbing of blood flowing?
3. Do you feel warmth or heat?
4. Does it feel tingly?
5. Do you feel the sensations of your pants or panties against your vulva?
6. Do you feel any wetness or swelling?
You may find yourself getting distracted, as other thoughts or sounds grab your attention. That’s ok. Just notice the thoughts and sounds, and then let them pass.
Now, touch your vulva with your hand (directly on the skin or over your clothes). What are the sensations you feel on your vulva? Can you feel the heat of your hand on your vulva skin?
Change the pressure (from gentle to firm or firm to gentle). Does this change the sensations?
Now, turn your focus to the rest of your body.
1. Is there any whole-body sensation?
2. Are there other parts of your body that are responding?
3. Has your breathing changed? Has your heart rate changed?
Are these sensations evoking any sexual thoughts or yearnings to do something (act on it?) read more on yearnings, or is it bringing up any other feelings in your? read more on emotional cues.
Before you take your attention away from your sensations (or act on them), take time to see what else you notice. Remember, this is a special sensation, a sensation that lives within you, a sensation you can remember and revisit any time you choose. And every time you feel this sensation, you are reminded of your strength and of what makes you special.